


In The End

by Metamorphosis2011 (Methamorphosis2011)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-01
Updated: 2014-02-01
Packaged: 2018-01-10 18:09:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1162881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Methamorphosis2011/pseuds/Metamorphosis2011
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Just, I don't get why you're so hell bent on going this alone. You know you don't have to do this by yourself, he would-"</p><p>"Sam, no. It's easier this way for everyone."</p>
            </blockquote>





	In The End

**Author's Note:**

> So this was borne out of extreme feels after watching this little youtube clip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=05eDUdV1avA of Jensen talking about how he had dreamed the end of the show and, let's say it was not a happy ending. I needed something to cheer me up. 
> 
> This is just a quick ficlet and not beta'ed (and I might have been slightly drunk while writing this) so apologies for any and all mistakes.

"You just take care of yourself."

"I will, Sam, don't you worry about me." Dean said, giving his brother a reassuring smile.

"Of course I'll worry about you. I still don't understand why you just can't stay-"

"Sam, we talked about this, at length. This life, the life you now have is not for me. Man, I'm happy you got out and that you found someone, it's what you always wanted after all, but me, I'm a hunter, always have been and I will die a hunter."

Sam looked at his brother, older and weathered by the life he had led, they had led. Lines clearly visibly on the corners of his eyes, but the eyes itself still held life in them, despite everything they had faced over the years. He wanted nothing more than for his brother to stay, but he knew Dean, knew that he needed to be out there, doing stuff. Standing still and being too long in one place just wasn't his brother. He got that now, as much as Dean got now that this life just wasn't Sam. He nodded in understanding, still not being able to hide the sadness at seeing his brother leave yet again.

"Just, I don't get why you're so hell bent on going this alone. You know you don't have to do this by yourself, he would-"

"Sam, no. It's easier this way for everyone."

"Have you even asked him? Or have the last years not taught you anything? Are you still making decisions for other people because you think you know what's best for them? In case it has slipped your attention, we are all grown ups here."

"You wouldn't understand." Dean gritted out, jaw set tight, and how could Sam possibly understand the extremely difficult and unique circumstances surrounding his and Cas' relationship, when Dean himself still hadn't quite figured it out.  

Sam sighed. He knew it was not likely to get any more information out of Dean.

"Maybe I would, maybe I wouldn't, but- just think about it. He would deserve to at least have a say in this."

"Ok, I promise." Dean said, before rummaging in his jacket pocket and fishing out his car keys."

"Here, I want you to have her."

"Dean, I can't-" Sam protested, staring at his brother disbelievingly.

"Yes you can, I want you to take her. She has seen way too much crap and pain over these last years. It's about time people created some happy memories around her. And, I'm sure you will need a bigger car some day soon. Plus, it just wouldn't be the same, driving her without you." Dean all but shoved the keys into Sam's hand, closing his fingers around them, making it crystal clear he wouldn't take no for an answer.

"But, what about you, how are you going to-?"

"No need to worry, I got myself a bike, always fancied myself driving one of those. Time to travel light for a bit, see where the road will take me." Dean tried to sound more cheerful than he felt. It had never been easy leaving his brother behind, and this time he honestly had no idea when he would see him next. Sam got out, found himself a nice girl and Dean would be damned before he would risk dragging any trouble to his doorstep any time soon

"Promise you call, and- you know, you always have a home here." Sam said, eyes filling with tears as he pulled Dean into an all crushing hug.

"I will, I promise." Dean's voice was breaking and he had to swallow back his own tears, instead giving Sam a reassuring grin.

"Bye Sam," Dean said and without further ado turned and walked down the road, legs heavy and feeling like he was about to leave a part of himself behind, and in a way he was.

He used the twenty minute walk to the garage where his bike was waiting for him to clear his head. Still, Sam's words stayed with him, running on an endless loop in his head. 'You don't have to do this by yourself, he would-', Dean shook his head. Some things were better left in the past.

Once he got on his bike, he felt the open road call to him, and he just set off, with no clear destination in mind. He knew it was reckless driving without a helmet but he just needed to feel the breeze against his face, the wind caressing his hair as he sped down the I70. Funny, how after all this time, all these years, Sam had ended up back in Kansas. Maybe it was poetic justice for him to go full circle like that.

He managed to make it to Indianapolis by the end of the day and after a short stay in a motel he set off again. Without openly admitting it to himself, he knew exactly where he had to go. Carry on East until he hit Pittsburgh. He just had to see him one more time, to say his proper goodbye, to get closure.

It had been about two months since he had last seen him. They had left on amicable terms, Dean explaining that he had stuff he needed to see to and that he had no idea when he would be back. Of course the other man knew exactly what he was implying between the lines, and to his credit had just let Dean leave with the offer of being there whenever Dean needed him.

And Dean had been debating this very point almost non stop over and over in his head. Did he need him? He had thought so at one point but since then so much had happened that he just didn't know anymore. What was it that he needed? And more importantly, what was it that Cas needed? The man, ex-angel, who had given up everything for him in the past, had eventually, after the angel wars had been over and dealt with, decided to give up his grace and live out the rest of his life as a human.

He had wanted to settle into some kind of normality and how could Dean refuse him that? The age old being who had been through and suffered so much, the blame for a fair bit of that suffering Dean squarely laid at his own feet. Cas deserved to be happy, and Dean just knew, he was not the kind of person to make people happy. Yet, with Sam's prodding and his own uncertainty, he was feeling selfish, just wanting to see him one more time.

That was how he ended up outside the 'Greyhound' bar, on the outskirts of Pittsburgh, where according to Sam Cas was now working as a bartender. Dean just stood outside debating whether to go inside or wait for Cas' shift to close and come out. He had caught a glimpse of the man through one of the windows and couldn't help the exciting jolt he felt in his stomach, together with his increasing heart rate. God, why had he left it so long to come and see his friend?

In the end he was too chicken to go inside. What was he supposed to even say? There were no words for all the things he wanted and could not say. They always had a tendency to dance around talking, in as they never really managed to sit down and just talk whatever it was that was between them, or not between them, out. They worked much better just on intuition, like they instinctively knew what the other needed. So instead of going in, he sat astride his bike and waited, watching the last few patrons leave the bar.

Soon enough the lights went out and the door opened. A woman with dark long hair stepping out, followed closely by Cas, chatting and laughing as they locked the door.

Dean felt a pang of something, a feeling like 'I shouldn't be here he looks so happy', but before he could turn and run he heard it, the voice he had missed more over these last few weeks than he cared to admit.

"Dean? Is that- Dean!"

"Hello Cas,"

The girl Cas was with gave him a knowing smirk and a prod in the back, gently showing him towards Dean. And Cas, despite the shook of seeing him, looked so happy, so honestly pleased to see him, Dean could feel his stomach doing summersaults, and that old longing, he had felt on and off around the ex-angel over the years, came out in full force, together with Sam's words in his head about letting Cas make his own decisions.

Before he could think about how this was all a real bad idea, Dean got off his bike and took a few determined strides towards Cas, coming to a stop mere inches from the man, taking in his form, his face, worn by the years but still radiant, until green eyes met blue.

"Cas," voice ragged and coming out in a low rasp as he continued to gaze at the dark haired man, bringing up his right hand and cupping his jaw tentatively, slowly brushing his thumb over chapped lips. He felt Cas' body shudder and before he could change his mind, he leaned in and did what he had wanted to do for so long, before he even knew that he did, brushing his lips gently against Cas' own.

Dean whimpered at the contact, it was so different to anything that he had ever experienced, but also so much more than he could have ever imagined. For a moment he was scared that Cas would push him away as he just stood there, motionless, but then Cas' own hands came up to grab Dean's face and pull him in, moving his head enough so he could deepen the kiss.

They broke apart after a minute, resting their foreheads together and breathing hard.

"I wanted to do that for quite some time, just thought you deserved to know." Dean whispered, too scared to open his eyes and look at his friend. Cas chuckled low in his throat, a sound that had Dean come out in goosebumps, but otherwise the man remained quiet.

After another moment, Dean stepped away, turning around and walking back towards his bike.

Cas just stood there, shell-shocked and seemingly unable to move.

Dean got back on his bike, lost in thought, just staring out at the road ahead, before, mind made up, finally turning to face Cas.

"You coming or what?"

Cas' answering smile, so open and- well, human – was the most beautiful thing Dean had ever seen.

"Of course," he stated matter of factly, like it was the only answer he could possibly give Dean, before turning to his friend who was still stood near the door of the bar. Cas walked up to her and placed the keys in her hands.

"Sorry, Mia, I'm-"

"Castiel, just go," she smiled, nodding in the direction of Dean. Cas pulled her into a brief hug, then walked back towards Dean and getting on the bike behind him, wrapping his arms around the man. Dean smiled to himself, giving Cas' arms a quick squeeze with his hands before starting the bike, feeling the reverberation as it sprung to life.

"Hold on tight," he yelled back behind him, and he knew it meant so much more than just making sure Cas wouldn't fall of the bike. Now that they were here, he did not ever want Cas to let go.

He could feel Cas' arms tighten around him in response and felt his head leaning against his shoulder, as he started to head down the road, and it felt right. It didn't matter anymore how they got here, and how they almost didn’t. He had no idea where they were going and what they were going to do but they would figure it out along the way. 


End file.
